Let the Wordzzle Flow ...

Two bloggie mentions before we get to the Wordzzle.

IVANHOE is celebrating her 100th post. Please take a moment to say congratulations and read her 100 list. She’s done a lot of interesting things and traveled to some very cool places. Ivanhoe gave all her readers a gift for her 100th. It’s right there at the top of my sidebar. Thank You Ivanhoe.

Our Wordzzle Mistress (sexy!) gave me the lovely Scribe award also there at the top of my sidebar. Thank You RAVEN! When you guys go over to check out her Wordzzle and all the other entries please peek in on her awards post and tell her how much she deserves the two awards she received this week. She hates that LOL

And now let the Wordzzle flow …

Ten Word Challenge: fabulous, aristocrat, tricycle, soft summer breeze, cat litter, silver-tongued devil, curtain rod, lilacs, Abraham Lincoln, garbage can

Mini Challenge: strangle-hold, revelation, dormancy, tripod, space cadet

I did something new with the mega. I continued a story! I’ve struggled with that in the past but Finola seems to speak to me.

The first part of Finola’s journey is HERE.

The further away from the school she got the better Finola felt. If the old jalopy she had stolen would just go faster than a tricycle she’d feel fabulous in no time. Finola giggled to herself, that silver-tongued devil Mr. Bugley thought he had a strangle-hold on being clever. Hah! It had taken her no more than a moment to get his car keys away from him. Now here she was, well on her way to the mountains. She had a brochure for Dormancy Estates and a road map. Once she found the Abraham Lincoln Expressway it would be an easy trip. The estates had been abandoned years ago and Finola was sure she could stay there for days without being found.

A soft summer breeze wafted in through the open windows. It smelled of lilacs. Such an improvement over the tiny room she had shared with Adele the Arian Aristocrat. Stupid, silly bitch; and her miserable old cat Space Cadet! What a pair they were. Adele had never cleaned Spacey’s cat litter and poor Finola drifted off to sleep each night with the smell of cat piss permeating her nostrils. Lilacs were certainly an improvement. Having never driven before it came as a revelation to Finola that if she switched gears the car would go faster. She was having a hard time keeping her foot flat on the gas pedal. The seat was stuck so far back, it appeared to have a curtain rod or a tripod wedged against it from the back to keep it upright.

Speed was crucial to Finola now. She needed to put distance between her and the hand grenade she had dropped into the garbage can by the school’s entrance. In her confused anxious state Finola could not remember if she had pulled the pin.

And my 10 word:

Adam Abraham Lincoln sat by the window in the club’s tiny crowded dressing room. He always made sure to get in early so he could feel the soft summer breeze on his face. He kept a vase of lilacs on the vanity to help fight the fierce combination of scents coming from the alley – tonight the house blend was day old garbage can full of food scraps and cat litter. Adam was well into having his face on when Sol the Silver-Tongued Devil burst into the room. “Would you believe I tripped over a rusty old tricycle? What the fuck is a tricycle doing back here!? And why aren’t the curtains drawn? Every crack head in town can watch us change”. Adam was used to Sol’s pre-show antics. “I’d close the curtains honey if there were any to close, the curtain rod has been down for weeks; we’re not exactly handy now are we?” Sol laughed, Adam always eased his jitters. “No dear I suppose we’re not, but we are the most fabulous duo the Aristocrat Club has ever seen”.

And the mini:

Mad Max was mourning the long state of dormancy within the robotic space cadet program. It had a strangle-hold on his dreams of universal domination. Max was well into his second bottle of Scotch when he had a revelation. If he stuck the program director’s severed head on a tripod …

The Arte y Pico Award

Twice in two days I’ve been presented with a lovely surprise.

First JENI and then PAGAN awarded me the ARTE Y PICO.

The award is given to recipients whose blogs exhibit creativity, design and interesting material and also for contributing to the blogging community. See the bottom of this post for the rest of the details.

Since I have two of them I decided to pass them on to two categories. I like categories and themes and symbolism. Keeps my chaos in check and helps me chose from a huge group of really talented folks that I adore.

The first category is young women I’d love to adopt. Smart, sassy, sexy, savvy women who I would be so proud to mother to death – in a healthy, non-obtrusive manner of course.

SNOOPMURPH – she adopted me! Poor kid, she didn’t read the fine print. Snoop’s blog is full of family and fun along with interesting posts about music and education and parenting. She is an astounding Mom and a good, sweet, supportive friend. Her children, her adorable handsome husband and her extended family are joyful to know.

TRANNY HEAD – another name I love! TH is irreverent to the nth degree. Her posts are hilarious. I always thought my son was a beautiful baby but you gotta get a look at her son! The Gerber Baby saw him and immediately arranged for plastic surgery. TH is a wonderful Mom while juggling law school and waiting for her hubby to come home from Iraq. I wish she wasn’t so far away; I’d love to offer free babysitting for life. I would also mention that she isn’t any where near as cynical and hard core as she likes to make out BUT she’d hurt me – so I won’t.

ETK – “I’m Just Sayin’” is part of her blog name and it fits perfectly. She shares her wonderful and often delightfully quirky observations. She shares them openly. etk is a whimsical soul and I love keeping up with her travels, her pink flamingo, her “baby” and all her other adventures of life.

LEIGHANN – more irreverence coupled with sexiness and sprinkled with lots of good momisms. I often call her ‘twisted sister’ but she’s younger than my son and I’d be proud to call her ‘twisted child’ and be a gorgeous granny to her “things”.

KNIGHT – she looks like a movie star and writes like a journalist. She’s interesting and open. She presents stories about her life and the world around her in a clear, no nonsense style while being a sweet and gentle person.

The second category is bloggers who have created and maintain projects. I often struggle to keep up with the blog so I have a lot of respect for those who extend their talents to reach out to and bring together fellow bloggers.

ANNA – her color related photo projects have made me appreciate so much more of my surroundings. Project Yellow was months ago and still I notice yellow wherever I go. She has made being stuck in traffic bearable! And when between projects her photos always inspire and awe.

ROGER – a very new blogger friend. His Creative Photography blog has only been up two weeks and already he has a good size circle of talented participants. When you visit the CP site make sure to check out the link to Roger’s main blog – great photos!!

MARY/the TEACH – I really don’t like the color red Mary LOL but wow have I found an appreciation for its place in a photo. Mary’s Ruby Tuesday project has brought so many great photographers together.

RAVEN – The Wordzzle Wonder Wiz! My vocabulary is better. My creative juices are juicier. My confidence in my writing feels more comfortable. All because of a hodge-podge of random words lovingly offered and tended to each week by a woman who should be published many times over.

Thank You JENI – grandma extraordinaire and keeper of the Bushisms.
Thank You PAGAN – artist, activist and soul mate.

Not all of us are into awards and less of us are into passing them on. It’s all good!
The blogging universe is populated by artists and heaven knows artists can not be tethered to rules or procedures.

Take the awards as they are intended. A nod to your talent and a small show of appreciation for who you are.

The rest of the award details are:
1) Pick five (5) blogs that you consider deserve this award for their creativity, design, interesting material, and also for contributing to the blogging community, no matter what language.

2) Each award has to have the name of the author and also a link to his or her blog to be visited by everyone.

3) Each award winner has to show the award and put the name and link to the blog that has given her or him the award itself.

4) Award-winner and the one who has given the prize have to show the link of “Arte y Pico” blog.

Creative Photography: Ice Ice Baby

I don’t know how creative my photography is in this shot. I will say that I had to lie down on the ground to get the best effect and getting back up sure felt creative.

This was taken this past winter. It had been freezing cold for days and then overnight the temperature rose into the 50s and it rained and rained. That spout thing was dripping like crazy all day.

Then – just as suddenly – the sun came out and the temps dipped. Dipped into - oh my god my skin is coming off - cold. The constant drip turned to a hesitant splat. And with each little splat that icicle got taller and taller, reaching back up toward the spout as if it wanted to climb back in there and warm up.

I’ve seen icicles hanging down but this guy was hanging up. And I thought he was the coolest thing. There’s a second little one which I think came from a drip off the pool cover, and the little guy is checking out his reflection in the pool base.

Please take a moment to check out all the Creative Photography entries. You won’t be disappointed.

Ruby Tuesday: Just Let Me Brush You!

My talented friend Mary/the teach hosts RUBY TUESDAY. Red has never been a favorite color of mine; it lags far behind Purple and Black (the RC colors of death) BUT thanks to the wonderful photos of those celebrating Ruby Tuesday I am gaining a new appreciation for red.

Mia and Siren both have their own grooming gloves. I have several wonderful, efficient, expensive brushes and combs that every cat before the Mi/Si duo of phobias loved. Nothing comes easy with these two.

Mia is more cooperative than Siren. As long as I hold her under the neck she’ll let me brush her – for a few moments at a time. Then she goes all stiff protestor posture which is my cue to back off. Since she’s long haired I need to brush her one million times a day to have any control over her fur.

Siren just doesn’t like to be touched. Even though he is so much better today than ever before he is very skittish (even for a cat!) and he has so many trust issues (even for a cat).

And he’s smarter than me – which means I can rarely trick him for more than a moment. In the photo above he is performing his usual inspection of the grooming glove which is almost always followed by one long yowl and a warning shot of paw and teeth.

Usually I just tell him I understand and that I’ll try again later. If I’m feeling risky I will try to contain him while he does an excellent interpretive dance right out of ‘The Exorcist’.

And if I’m in a pissy mood of my own then I’ll just remind him that whatever doesn’t get brushed off today gets thrown up tomorrow.

I swear he’s laughing as I walk away.

Oh George ...

George was the first person to make me realize humor was powerful! You could tell people important things, make them think about serious issues – and make them laugh!!

Youtube has an amazing array of George’s work. “The 7 Words You Can’t Say on TV” started a Supreme Court Battle.

Search George Carlin and Religion and find some of the greatest stand-up ever performed.

And his take on everyday life is equally hilarious. Check out “Cats and Dogs” and look for his incredible rant on consumerism called “Stuff”

Here are but a few of the pearls of wisdom from George Carlin …

Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity.

I have as much authority as the Pope; I just don't have as many people who believe it.

I'm completely in favor of the separation of Church and State. My idea is that these two institutions screw us up enough on their own, so both of them together is certain death.

The status quo sucks.

Think off-center.

When you're born you get a ticket to the freak show. When you're born in America, you get a front row seat.

And this quote sums up his brilliance.

I think it's the duty of the comedian to find out where the line is drawn, and cross it deliberately.

I am going to miss you terribly George. All that kinetic energy made me think you were immortal.

I was wrong …

Summer Wordzzlin' - Ain't It Divine

Happy Summer Everybody! Fan yourself with a good dictionary – it develops upper arm strength – crank up the laptop and enjoy some Wordzzle.

Brought to us by the always cool Raven. Stop by her place, check out her stories and don’t forget to check out Mr. Linky (he might be wearing Speedos) so that you can enjoy all the Wordzzle entries.

Ten Word Challenge: solitaire, pathological, grackles, alternative life style, manifest destiny, polarization, ugly duckling, folding chairs, flibberty-gibbet, hand grenade

Finola could not understand why she had been assigned the task of setting out all the folding chairs. Was it because she was the ugly duckling of the group? Perhaps it was due to the fact that the house mother often referred to her as a flibberty-gibbet. Such an unfair assessment! So what if she was a pathological liar. Her lies were harmless – she had lied about knowing what Manifest Destiny meant, she had lied about seeing the grackles build their nest. Were white lies dangerous? Finola viewed lying as an alternative life style, much like role playing and far more entertaining than one more game of solitaire. It certainly wasn’t meant to cause strife in the house; she shouldn’t be held responsible for the deep sense of polarization that had developed among her housemates. She was being punished for a power she didn’t possess. Well she would show them. Finola reached into the deep pocket of her summer frock and fondled the bumpy texture of the hand grenade. What an explosive recital this would be!

And the Mini Challenge: marathon, the butler did it, curtain, hand cream, flatulence

Buster Bugley peeked out from behind the red curtain. He despised playing piano for these ridiculous girl’s school recitals. They were a marathon of bad singing and clumsy ribbon dancing. He wished he had the balls to put slimy hand cream all over the stairs leading to the stage, what a sight that would be!; rows and rows of silly girls slipping on the stairs like a demented dominos game. Buster’s attempt to choke back his maniacal laughter just aggravated his flatulence and soon the entire back stage area smelled like rotten eggs and baked beans. “Good Lord” exclaimed Finola, “what is that putrid smell?” Buster looked at the odd girl standing there with her hands thrust deep in her pockets. “How the hell should I know?” he barked at her, “perhaps the butler did it”.

And my Mega …

The Pokey brothers stood together and looked at the huge neon sign for their new club – ‘Polarization’. All that was left to do after weeks and weeks of preparation was to get through opening night. The club was their attempt to make a living and have an alternative life style at the same time. In celebration of opening night they had booked ‘Manifest Destiny’ a hugely popular country band and ‘Pathological Pukers’ – an up and coming rap/punk/metal group. ‘Flibberty-Gibbet’ a strawberry colored rip-off of ‘Blue Man Group’ was the opening act. The idea behind the club was to bring people together by offering vastly different music on the same bill. “Are all the folding chairs set up? Is the curtain set? Will it actually open this time?” Paulie asked his brother. “I’ve been worried about that new bartender; he just sits in the office playing solitaire”. Petey grinned at his big brother. “It’s all going to be fine, relax”. “This marathon worry fest of yours will kill ya, or at least cause chronic flatulence”. “I do feel like a hand grenade exploded in my gut” Paulie admitted. “Discovering that nest of grackles under the marquee really threw me”. “Go make yourself pretty. You are the family ugly duckling so use lots of hand cream on your face”. Paulie smiled at the old childhood joke. “I wonder why you got all the looks” he winked at Petey. “Aww Paulie, you know why, Mom told ya a million times, the butler did it”.

Creative Photography: Dance The Night Away

Roger is hosting a weekly Creative Photography contest and against all my inner demons and child like apprehensions I decided to join in.

What is it about the word contest that can set a person to thinking nothing they ever did was any good?

Note to self: Start thinking of every meal as a contest – lose 30 pounds by being too intimidated to eat.

Anyway …

I never take a good photo if I set out to. I love what I see in my mind’s eye I just don’t always capture it. That’s why I take photos all the time – everywhere, everything. I love discovering them later.

After traveling through my archives muttering like Forest Gump – “Creative is as creative does” I found this shot.

I took it last year at my niece’s Sweet 16 party. Her “theme” was Disco 70s and the dance floor was packed all night. I settled in by the DJ (he was adorable!) and shot and shot and shot the night away. The lighting was terrible – dark purple and strobe lights and disco balls – OH MY! Virtually nothing came out but I played around with enhancement and balance and cropped my little heart out.

When my niece and her friends saw this one the reactions were:

“trippy”
“awesome”
“hot”
“looks like something MTV used to show” – ahhh yes – remember when MTV actually had something to do with music and dance?
“wow, retro – just like the old days” – hilarious kid! Hope I’m around when he’s bald.

So. Well. Whoop There It Is.

Hope you check out all the other entries.

Ruby Tuesday: May I Have a Word ...

Mary/the Teach hosts Ruby Tuesday. You got it – RED on Tuesdays. Go on over and check it out.

I love words and I love books.

This is one of my prized possessions

She’s an oldie. This edition was published in 1982. I know!

Imagine that. E.V.O.O. isn’t in there!

OMG! – WTF!? How did we ever get through a day needing to say four full words?

Extra Virgin Olive Oil? I’m exhausted just typing it.

It’s so much easier to capitalize each letter and make sure the freakin’ periods are in there.

Now I sound like a cranky old lady. These kids and their abbreviations and their text messages. Their books on audio and music on ether and movies on phones.

I love me some technology.

BUT …

That tingly feeling when you riffle the pages. Looking for one word I always found many others. The smell of books, especially old ones. The mustiness suggesting protection of ideas. The tiny print giving the feeling that there is so much to be discovered. They had to cozy it all in there and still the book is heavy.

The wonderful weight of knowledge.

Dianne in Wordzzle Land

In an attempt to not fall through the black hole of stress I decided to write some silly stuff this week. It felt great doing it and once again I must thank the effervescent RAVEN for bringing Wordzzle into my tired mind.

I’ve been grateful for photo projects this week since I’ve alternated between crying, shouting (usually at myself) and wishing desperately to run away or climb a clock tower – with a water pistol. Even in my worst moments I am a peaceful person.

And then, as usual, I got the hell over myself because I was annoying the crap out of myself. I even lost my sense of humor more than a few times this week.

But to paraphrase Billy Martin – “Never take shit from asshats.”

On to Wordzzle …

Ten Word Challenge: prenomial, inexplicable, tangerine, masks, chocolate cake, panorama, librarian, Stonehenge, meek, florid

Panorama Pendergrass was experiencing an inexplicable desire for adventure. She had been head librarian at Stonehenge Scholastical Manor for close to thirty years; in fact they had just celebrated her anniversary with fizzy water and chocolate cake. Panny was a meek soul. Her idea of going wild was to try a new florid handwriting style. Sometimes when feeling really frisky she’d think up prenomial titles for the entire Salamander family, she was quite fond of them, especially the sisters. This morning however was very different. She had felt it the moment she sprayed on the spicy tangerine body splash. Now, as she wandered aimlessly through the ‘Masks of Darkness’ exhibit, she knew she had to take a bold step. She stopped in front of the Darth Vader display and whipped out her cell phone. “I need a one way ticket to Las Vegas” she told the travel agent. “I want to leave today, there’s someone there I must find.”

And for the Mini Challenge: vituperative, bunny rabbit, house warming, sanitation, triangular

The sanitation truck tried to stop before it jumped the fence and landed on the small triangular patch of grass. The sound of huge tires screeching interrupted the house warming party the bunny rabbits were having at the third hole from the curb. Boxer, the head of the rabbit clan, was about to begin some vituperative railing about crazy humans and their machines when the huge oak tree jumped out of nowhere and blocked the trucks progress.

And the Mega …

The Most Majestic Sarah Sasquatch Stonehenge was the last to arrive at the house warming. “She’s always making a ridiculous entrance” Barbara Billingsley Bunny Rabbit said to her meek and quiet friend Tallulah Tootsie Triangular. “And she insists on being announced by her full name, including that absurd prenomial title she bestowed upon herself. It is inexplicable to me that I am the only one to see through her florid ways.” “Well dear Barbara we all wear our masks now, don’t we?” Tallulah mumbled through a mouthful of chocolate cake. Although Tallulah liked Barbara she hated her vituperative rants which were always worse at large gatherings. Tallulah wanted to enjoy the party. The food was delicious and the house was stunning. She always found herself in the position of keeping the peace. “Social Sanitation” Tallulah chuckled. “Are you babbling to yourself?” Barbara snapped. “I bet you weren’t listening to me at all. I was just asking you how in the world Luscious Lycra Lizzy could possibly afford a house like this on a librarian’s salary.” Tallulah plucked some fruit from the crystal fruit bowl and grabbed Barbara’s arm. “Come, it’s almost sunset, let’s enjoy the panorama before us. If you behave I’ll peel a tangerine for you. And if you don’t I’ll gag you with it”

I hope you all have a lovely (and silly) weekend!

Project Blue: Last Call

It’s time to bid adieu to Project Blue. Stop by Anna’s Place to see all the entries.
Some really great photography out there.

One of the best moments from one of my favorite films ‘Steel Magnolias’ is when Olympia Dukakis tells a bedazzled and bejeweled Darryl Hannah that “the only thing that separates us from the animals is our ability to accessorize”.

My animals have accessories.

One of Siren’s favorites is his official George W. Bush catnip filled pal. I use the term pal loosely.

The back view is Siren’s. It’s worn and its stuffing is coming out. It has seen some rough times. The reason I call it an accessory rather than a toy is because Siren will walk around carrying it in his mouth. If only it were that easy to keep tabs on the real one!

Siren will also drop his ‘W’ then jump on it as though shocked that it’s there. He sits on it until he can get his back paws around it and then flips over and pummels that sucker. He’s such a good boy!!

The front view is Mia’s. It’s a lot younger than Siren’s so it looks better but it’ll probably always look good. I fear that Mia might be a Bush Republican! She looks at it confused then licks it once or twice and pushes it into a corner. She doesn’t want to play with it and she doesn’t want to hurt it – she just wants it to get the hell out of her way.

I think the photo is pretty clear but just in case:
Back View
Left hand – EZ Guide to Being President
Right hand – Super Hero Comics
Back pocket – English as a Second Language
On his back – If found return me to the White House

Front View
Lapel pocket – Bad Guy Cards
Left wrist – Time to Cut Taxes watch

His red cowboy boots have giant Ws on them.

Take a look at the great stuff at Fat Cat Inc. – I got these at a local store but you can order them and lots more from the site.

Ruby Tuesday: Big Red Truck

My friend Mary/the Teach hosts Ruby Tuesday.

Go check out some cool shots of RED

It is 100 degrees here today! Do you have any idea what that much heat does to the air over a major metropolitan area!? It ain’t pretty.

Adding to the junk in the air are those idiots who have to drive big old trucks for no good reason.

May I present my favorite pick-up driving jerk – my son! And his big ole red truck.

To cool us all off a bit I chose a photo from the winter of 2004 – the year the truck was born, its first snow.

Stay Cool Kids!

Project Blue: Graduation Day

My niece graduated from college last month. I was just going through the photos and these two struck me as something to share for project blue.

I like all the hustle and bustle going on in the first shot. It was a couple of hours before the ceremony and family, friends, and graduates were all milling around - taking photos and looking for classmates and trying to cut the line for water.

I especially like the young man to the right, with his shorts and flip-flops under the gown. And the red-haired man leaning over - he was calling to a young child to come be in a photo. The little girl (out of camera range) was telling everyone she wanted to graduate too - her Mom said she would - in about 18 years - and the girl said "No! - that's too long! Today!"

The second photo was taken at the start of the ceremony, just as the graduates took their seats. I love the rows and rows of blue caps. Each one a person having one of the biggest days of their life - and each one of them connected to each other and to those in the audience.

I find it so bitter-sweet. Bitter because they deserve better than the state of the world today. Yet sweet - and hopeful - as each one of them is so young, so strong, so full of promise.

Make sure to stop by Anna’s Place and see more Project Blue.

Wordzzling on a Hot Summer Saturday

It’s time for another Wordzzle. Please check out all the Wordzzlers at Raven’s Nest

I went for the Mega this week.

Ten Word Challenge: spaghetti, larkspur, Prilosec, roaring lion, adamant, green green grass of home, paradox, filibuster, face cream, trout fishing

Mini Challenge: jury of ones peers, barking dog, a wing and a prayer, liver, sprained ankle

The Senator would never admit it to his wife Cindy but he was thrilled to have a sprained ankle. It was so much better to be enjoying the green green grass of home at his ranch in Larkspur than to be on the campaign trail, trying to come off like a roaring lion when he felt like a barking dog. He had been adamant that Cindy go back to DC on her own, she loved the city and its social life. He had watched her pack up her usual piles of clothes and shoes and her case full of lotions and face cream. He thanked her for making him dinner and for setting out his pills – he always forgot his liver meds and after Cindy’s spaghetti sauce he’d need the Prilosec. Now he was alone in the house and the quiet was both calming and startling. He moved slowly to his study and sat by the bay window. Cindy had redecorated the room and there were photos and mementos everywhere. A photo of him and George W trout fishing – Christ that moron had ruined it for him. A newspaper clipping from his first filibuster – he looked so young and strong, he remembered being idealistic. He smiled at the photo of his law school graduating class. He and Tom Somebody had talked about opening a bar near campus – they were going to call it ‘Jury of Ones Peers’ - that might have been a fun way to make a living. He gazed at a stunning photo of Cindy – she was christening their new sailboat – she had named it ‘A Wing and a Prayer’ - when it hit him. He was too old and too tired to lead a country. He was losing himself – the strong and brave straight talking man had been replaced by a bumbling bullshit artist. He chuckled at the paradox that presented itself to him and poured a stiff Scotch. He really hoped the young Senator won in November.

The Perfect Storm of Stress and The Romper Room Rant

I’ve been buried the past couple of days. It’s one of those times when all the crap hits all the fans while all the rest of the crap is flowing downstream at the same moment. The perfect storm of stress.

I have been:
Forced to participate in endless conference calls with representatives of the company that acquired the company that owns the company that is one of my biggest clients. I have done projects for this company for 20 years. I’m known for being early on deadlines and under budget – routinely, consistently. So what are all the calls for!? “Let us discuss how projects can be done quickly and cost effectively”. OK John J. Junior Exec – you incredibly ignorant slug. Please do tell.

I have been:
Trying to collect from a client. They owe me over $12,000 for months and months. For projects I did for them last year. 5 weeks ago I was told the check would be cut in a week or so. Yep! – It’s in the mail, it’s on the truck. And I walk a tightrope with these collection attempts. There is a small determinate number of clients giving out work to a large number of vendors. Can’t really piss them off while trying to get paid. Whores in shark infested waters – my new company slogan.

I have been:
Juggling minimum amount due dates and extensions on extensions. Funny – the fact that my client hasn’t paid me in months doesn’t seem to impress my bill collectors. Seems that only large corporations can get away with non-payment.

I have been:
Vocally and passionately fighting with the big-ass-asshats at the big-ass store. Seems that sales associates are now supposed to clean the store. Not a little dusting or tidying – we already do that along with lifting, carrying, stocking, boxing, folding, unfolding and hanging. We also clean the fitting rooms. Of course this is in addition to actually doing our job – ya know – sales! Well now we’re supposed to polish shelving and stands. Clean “on, around, and under all displays”. Really!? If I wanted to be a cleaning person I would be a cleaning person – and I would earn $30 an hour off the books. Since I’m 52 freakin’ years old with a bad back I am NOT cleaning your fucking hell hole of a store that hasn’t been professionally cleaned in 20 years. I’m certainly not cleaning it during the same hours that I am supposed to be helping customers. And I’m not cleaning it while the temperature in my work area is 87 degrees (I bought in a temp gauge that disappeared the next day) because the AC unit is too old and the duct work is bad. And I’m not cleaning while you continue to cut the hours of the cleaning people – you know – the ones who took the job knowing they’d be cleaning! It is not that I think I’m too good for cleaning – one of my many 2nd or 3rd jobs over the years was cleaning office suites all night. NO! I’m not going to clean because you just can’t suck any more labor out of me for a few bucks an hour. NO MORE! And if you keep pushing there’s going to be news crews and labor people crawling all over your filthy store.

So in the midst of this – well – my stress level has been a wee bit high – just a tad. But I am glad to report that I never lost sight of the bigger picture. I never lost sight of the fact that the $12,000 I’m waiting for is a years salary for many of the folks I work with at the big-ass hell hole. I never lost sight of the fact that my home is not in foreclosure, that I don’t have small children, that although I can’t pay for it on time – I do have health insurance.

And not losing sight of the big picture is a big deal. It helps us focus on the real enemies, the true threats. It strengthens us and gives asshats like Bushie Boy and his ‘All Corrupt, All the Time Choir’ less power over us.

And it left me enough room in my heart and soul to rejoice in my nominee for President actually, finally being called the nominee he has already been for weeks.

I’m also managing to maintain my sense of humor. I called a friend last night to ask some labor law advice and some collections advice. During the conversation I mentioned that some of the cleaning people at the big-ass hell hole call me “Miss Dianne”. (another story). This lead to the Romper Room Rant.

Lawyer friend: Miss Dianne!? Makes you sound like that bitch from Romper Room
Me: I always hated her.
LF: Hated her? That’s strong.
Me: You know how I am about perky.
LF: You would have done a great job on Romper Room
Me: Me? Romper Room!? Only if it was Adults Only Romper Room
LF: There’s an idea. Did SNL do that?
Me: Maybe or maybe I just dreamed it during a twisted moment.
LF: Miss Dianne and her Warped Wand see all …
Me: During the one hour Comedy Central Special – Romper Room Rant
LF: I’m still in the office – I can’t laugh
Me: I see Billy and Bobby – Billy stop sniffing the glue; it’s for your school project
LF: Laughter is not permissible in the halls of corporate justice
Me: Bobby go warn Mommy that Daddy’s home – don’t be scared – the pool boy isn’t hurting her
Me: I see Susie and Sally – Susie honey you can’t keep vomiting and then eating more Ring Dings
LF: Ahhh – eating disorders are always so funny
Me: Sally – Sally - Miss Dianne knows what you’re doing! Make sure to always have extra batteries
LF: You know how loud I laugh
Me: Fuck em, it’s after hours
LF: It’s never after hours. Not in the world of greed and despair.
Me: Well that brought me down
LF: So you’re stable now?
Me: No.
LF: Good.

And then we drifted into talk of all our less than stable moments and the hilarity that usually ensues.

It sucks that I missed Peace Blast but I try to blog for Peace in my own way all the time so I’m letting myself off the hook on that one.

And hopefully I’ll be finding some more Project Blue soon.

Back to work now – I have so many projects that I’ll never get paid for to finish.

Note: Romper Room – for all you youngins - was a children’s show during the 60s – I don’t remember what they did on Romper Room other than the perky annoying bitch who hosted the show would hold up this freaky whirling pattern wand and “see you”. She never once saw me! And that pissed me off. Then again, I’m sure her head would have exploded had she seen me.

Project Blue: Take Three - More at the Fair

I had a really early conference call that lasted way too long cause corporate types love to hear themselves talk so I'm going to share another older photo for today's blue.

I can't remember what this ride is called but it basically takes you up in the sky, you hover, drop slow, back up, hover, drop faster. It was really popular! There was always a line.

It was also located in a shaded area near the beer so parents loved it. Give the kids a roll of tickets, grab a beer and sit under the tree. The kids would go on a dozen times before they asked for anything.

My favorite part of the photo is the feet. The blue of the sky is too light to me and the underside of the ride is too dark. But I love the feet.

Go on over to Anna’s place to see more Project Blue.

Project Blue: Take Two - At the Fair

I missed Take One of Anna's latest photo/color project but I made it for Take Two. During Project Green I got so confused I never knew what Take was coming or going but this time I'm going to try to be consistent and sequential - take that math!

I took this at a small local street fair. Guess what!? It's the Scooter Ride! Yes! Yes! It Is!

Personally I thought it was the bumper cars but ...

If you don't visit ANNA you should. Even when between projects her place is a treat for the eyes. During one of her projects it is an absolute feast of talented photographers.

Camera Critters - Hanging Out and Blending In

I’m back in Camera Critters this week. If you’d like to see other photos of all sorts of critters – check it out HERE.

Misty started this several weeks ago and I’m really hoping to get back into participating every Sunday. It’s always great fun to share photos so check it out.

This is ‘Sleeves’. He’s my neighbor. When his humans go away for the weekend I look after him. One of his favorite places to hang out is his big brother’s bed. As you can see – big bro loves the stuffed critters and Sleeves enjoys them too.

This reminds me of one of my favorite scenes from the movie ‘ET’ – when ET tries to hide by blending in with the stuffed animals in the closet. The finding each other and screaming scene between ET and little Drew Barrymore is delightful.

And that reminds me of a great scene from ‘My Cousin Vinny’ when Joe Pesci tells Marisa Tomei to tone it down – she needs to fit in with the small town folk and she sneers at him and says – “Yeah, and you blend”.
(click to enlarge)