Living History

I got a wonderful e-mail in response to my Dr. King post.

My newest adopted daughter, a friend of my daughter-in-law, is a teacher. She asked me if she could share my childhood story of Martin with her students. One of her kids had mentioned that "without Dr. King you wouldn't be able to teach here". I guess she saw this click in her kids and wanted to encourage them to think about history and relate to it on a personal level.

And it got me thinking ...

I was seated behind two young girls during "Hairspray - the Movie" and they didn't believe that black kids and white kids were not allowed to dance together in the early days of American Bandstand. They thought it was just part of the storyline - a "way to give Queen Latifah something to sing about". When the house lights came on we smiled at one another and I assured them it was true, hard as it was for them to identify with, it was true. We had a nice conversation about then and now - I think they learned a little from me, I certainly gained new perspective from them.

And that got me thinking ...

I was in NYC's Greenwich Village a few years ago and I noticed a group of teens. They were a little rowdy, one had an open beer bottle, the others were just a bit too loud - and one couple was making out - on my car! Figures - the one time I find a free parking spot on the streets of NY. Even a few years ago my car was junky and I was going to walk on when a male couple passed holding hands. The teens got louder - mostly giggling and gasping and jostling each other and again I was going to walk on - kids will be kids. Then the male of the make-out couple said the "F" word and the female made some kissing noises and said she was "disgusted" and well - my inner "Norma Rae" came to life. As I walked over to the teens, under the pretext of opening my car, I mentioned to them that they should lose the beer bottle, there was a cop on the corner and I was sure he'd noticed them since they were so loud. I also told them that they were getting a lot of unwanted attention with the use of the "F" word. My plan worked, my looking out for them gained me their attention and appreciation. They apologized for being all over my car, I shrugged, said it was a piece of crap - no harm done. I asked the male of the make-out couple (he was black) whether he knew that, not that long ago, he would have been arrested (or worse) for kissing a white girl. "Well not today" he exclaimed - looking shocked and confused. True, true I told him, "and isn't that wonderful!" - "People fought and died for those civil rights". To his credit he caught on. "So the "F" word is as bad as the "N" word" he remarked. I told him I didn't know how to measure the words, they were all repugnant to me. I wasn't going to lecture (I really wanted to) - I was just asking him, all of them, if they had ever considered their place in a greater world. A world where other people didn't have the same rights as they did. A world where it was dangerous to show who you loved. "Never thought of that" - "My father says the "F" word all the time" - "We call each other gay". I don't know how much of a difference I made with those kids.

But I got them thinking ...

I had very negative role models in my parents. I often tell people I was "raised by wolves". One of the things that saved me was other adults - my Grandmother, the nosy but loving neighbor, a few inspiring teachers, Dr. King. By sharing themselves, by talking to me as a person they laid the foundation for a free thinking adult. They showed me my place in a greater world. They made something click for me by being there - being part of my history.

And so I realized ...

I followed their lead all these years. I rarely judge young people. I often try to share a moment, a tid-bit of my experience - to show them their place in a greater world - to hopefully make them feel how we are all connected and to give them, if even for a moment, the confidence and security to think outside the box of their homes, their schools, their friends, their environment.

There are so few tangible perks to getting older - the joints ache, the eyes get tired, stuff sags. BUT - the value of our place in the living history of younger folks can be immeasurable. I see it in the eyes of my VFW buddies - how good they feel when they share their stories with me and see me click on something I never considered before. Makes them feel young and important - makes me still see, at my ripe old age, how we all never stop learning.