Friday, June 13, 2008

Dianne in Wordzzle Land

In an attempt to not fall through the black hole of stress I decided to write some silly stuff this week. It felt great doing it and once again I must thank the effervescent RAVEN for bringing Wordzzle into my tired mind.

I’ve been grateful for photo projects this week since I’ve alternated between crying, shouting (usually at myself) and wishing desperately to run away or climb a clock tower – with a water pistol. Even in my worst moments I am a peaceful person.

And then, as usual, I got the hell over myself because I was annoying the crap out of myself. I even lost my sense of humor more than a few times this week.

But to paraphrase Billy Martin – “Never take shit from asshats.”

On to Wordzzle …

Ten Word Challenge: prenomial, inexplicable, tangerine, masks, chocolate cake, panorama, librarian, Stonehenge, meek, florid

Panorama Pendergrass was experiencing an inexplicable desire for adventure. She had been head librarian at Stonehenge Scholastical Manor for close to thirty years; in fact they had just celebrated her anniversary with fizzy water and chocolate cake. Panny was a meek soul. Her idea of going wild was to try a new florid handwriting style. Sometimes when feeling really frisky she’d think up prenomial titles for the entire Salamander family, she was quite fond of them, especially the sisters. This morning however was very different. She had felt it the moment she sprayed on the spicy tangerine body splash. Now, as she wandered aimlessly through the ‘Masks of Darkness’ exhibit, she knew she had to take a bold step. She stopped in front of the Darth Vader display and whipped out her cell phone. “I need a one way ticket to Las Vegas” she told the travel agent. “I want to leave today, there’s someone there I must find.”

And for the Mini Challenge: vituperative, bunny rabbit, house warming, sanitation, triangular

The sanitation truck tried to stop before it jumped the fence and landed on the small triangular patch of grass. The sound of huge tires screeching interrupted the house warming party the bunny rabbits were having at the third hole from the curb. Boxer, the head of the rabbit clan, was about to begin some vituperative railing about crazy humans and their machines when the huge oak tree jumped out of nowhere and blocked the trucks progress.

And the Mega …

The Most Majestic Sarah Sasquatch Stonehenge was the last to arrive at the house warming. “She’s always making a ridiculous entrance” Barbara Billingsley Bunny Rabbit said to her meek and quiet friend Tallulah Tootsie Triangular. “And she insists on being announced by her full name, including that absurd prenomial title she bestowed upon herself. It is inexplicable to me that I am the only one to see through her florid ways.” “Well dear Barbara we all wear our masks now, don’t we?” Tallulah mumbled through a mouthful of chocolate cake. Although Tallulah liked Barbara she hated her vituperative rants which were always worse at large gatherings. Tallulah wanted to enjoy the party. The food was delicious and the house was stunning. She always found herself in the position of keeping the peace. “Social Sanitation” Tallulah chuckled. “Are you babbling to yourself?” Barbara snapped. “I bet you weren’t listening to me at all. I was just asking you how in the world Luscious Lycra Lizzy could possibly afford a house like this on a librarian’s salary.” Tallulah plucked some fruit from the crystal fruit bowl and grabbed Barbara’s arm. “Come, it’s almost sunset, let’s enjoy the panorama before us. If you behave I’ll peel a tangerine for you. And if you don’t I’ll gag you with it”

I hope you all have a lovely (and silly) weekend!


Leighann said...

I dig Dianne's Wordzzle Land!! You're a terrific writer doll. :)

Raven said...

I enjoyed these immensely! I love that you brought both the Salamander sisters AND Darth Vader into your first one. I wonder if that's going to be the new challenge. I'm looking forward to finding out what Darth and those pesky salamanders have been up to. Maybe Sgt. Johnson will be solving some crime committed by the ineptly evil Darth. Wow. The possiblities are endless. Congrats on being first and on awesome wordzzles as always. I loved the names in the last one and Tallulah is such a sweetie.

Casdok said...


And i love your job ideas! :)

bobbie said...

Sometimes silliness saves the day. You are a genius. - And Raven's comments are small works of art too, aren't they?
Wonderful, as always!

Akelamalu said...

What fabulous names you came up with Dianne!

I need to know who Panorama Pendergrass is going to Vegas to find - you can't just leave us in suspense like that! :)

Dianne said...

ahhhhhh Leighann - you always get me with "doll"
been thinking about you and the floods! hope you're all OK, at least I know you had power as of last night

raven - bobbie is right. your comments are always like a bit of art and treasure. would you believe that in the middle of the night I woke up thinking - damn I forgot Sgt. Johnson! that's what pitchers of Pina Colada will do.

casdock - thanks!! I'm always happy when you're blogging.

bobbie - you're right. silliness can save the day. the worst thing is to take ourselves too seriously.

akelamalu - I always wanted to be named Tallulah. It just seems so whimsical.

Karen said...

I love em. Great job.

Jeff B said...

Holy Guacamole Batman! These were fantastic. Just the names alone were impressive, but the stories behind them were even better.

Whatever funkiness you were feeling this week certainly didn't impeed your creativity.

Dianne said...

karen - thanks gorgeous!

jeff - thanks!! sometimes I can turn the funk into something. I'm so glad when that happens.
Your story pretty much rocked Gotham City as well :)

Michael Manning said...

Leave it to Dianne and Raven to chat about a vituperative e-mail! I knew immediately that I was missing something. Could it be perhaps a house warming party thrown by Hugh Hefner? If so, I'd take him aside and implore upon him to forget Holly and go back on his hands and knees to Kimberly, or at least date another bunny rabbit. I'd also stay away from The Grotto as Comedian Bill Maher said there may be sanitation issues from triangular couples who seem to reside in there constantly. Hugh, you missed the boat with Kimberly. Dumb, dumb, dumb. :D)

Raven said...

Secret wordzzler, Michael (see comment above) left a wordzzle in the messages at Raven's Nest too. I got to have a mansion and a cooking staff in mine. Worth checking out.

Carletta said...

Came over from Raven's to check out yours - loved them!
Hope you're having that silly weekend too.

Dianne said...

ahhhh yes! Michael the drive-by Wordzzler!
I love it!

carletta - thanks! I'm glad you stopped by and I'm glad you liked the silliness :)

the teach said...

Dianne, tremendous wordzzles! You did such a good job! What fun! I always like silliness!

Jay Simser said...

Wonderful. A flood of comments are also marvelous. I am so glad you "found" me and brought me on board this wild and wacky merry-go-round. jcs

Tammy said...

You keep wowing me!

Dianne said...

thanks teach! :)
I really enjoyed coming up with these.

mr simser :) you are a treasured "find".

thank you so much tammy!

the walking man said...

while i liked these well enough Dianne, i think it would be funnier to hear what you did to them that caused the stress...see more commonality Billy Martin!

Bob-kat said...

I love these short stories of yours, because that is what they are. They convey so much information about the people in them that I simply want to learn more! Especially the first one. I am in the mood for adventure myself and I want to know what happens when she gets to Vegas!

Sounds like you could do with an adventure yourself. Or at least some time away from work. I hope the next week is better for you and try to keep hold of your sense of humour as it's a good one ;)

Dianne said...

mark - the stress was juggling bills and clients - bills since I still haven't been paid and clients because in this day and age corporations believe they hold all the decks of all the cards - and I suppose they do.
I adored Billy Martin - got to meet him once at Yankee Stadium, we used to go as soon as the stadium opened and watch batting practice and warm-ups. He and the Goose were hung over and came over to talk. I gave Billy an aspirin and I rubbed Goose's head LOL

bobkat - I may try to continue a story - haven't decided. thanks for the good wishes :)
I know you know how it is.

Jeff B said...

come by when you have a chance, the mystry is solved and I've got a little somethin' for ya.

Jay said...

Panorama Pendergrass is taking a huge chance! Vader is an evil man. She should be messing with him. ;-)

Jo said...

Those were so fun, I'm in love with your names! Uh-oh, I'm feeling a Panorama-Vadar crossover...maybe it'll turn out like Sid & Nancy?

I say climb the clocktower & throw oranges. Everybody needs a little more vitamin the squelchy explosions will feel satisfying.

Dianne said...

Panorama is one tough cookie Jay ;)
don't let the meek librarian act fool ya! she's been all pent up too long

jo - thanks!! and heaven knows what hell those Salamander sisters can cause.
I was thinking rocks off the clock tower but that's only at the sun so they'd just hit me in the head.
so maybe I will go with oranges. of course this assumes I can make the climb and have any energy left for throwing.

tt said...

Ya know...whenever I finish reading one of your wordzzle's, it feels like I've put down a book that I've just started...and can't remember where I left it!! More-more.....and then what happened??

Hope the coming week is a sunny yellow one with light green and orange around the edges. :)

Ron said...

Hi Dianne,

Just stopped by via Jeff's blog to congratulate you for guessing the photo of the grocery store basket!!

WAY TO GO!!! Good eyes!

Really enjoyed your Wordzzle too.

I read your profile and saw you lived in Jersey. I live in Philly, so we're almost neighbors! And wasn't the heat here last week HORRENDOUS??

Matt-Man said...

Bravissimo. How I have longed to watch you Wordzzle. Cheers Di!!

Dianne said...

tt - thanks darlin' - "Hope the coming week is a sunny yellow one with light green and orange around the edges" - that is a beautiful, poetic line!

ron - thanks for stopping by :)
I haven't been to Philly in a long time, last time I was there I had a great time. the heat was unbearable! supposed to be cooler this week.
I laughed when I read I was the one who figured out the shopping baskets, all those years of schleping groceries finally paid off!

matt-man - "Bravissimo." I love it when you talk all foreign to me ;)

Diane Mandy said...

I hate that you've been at odds with yourself. I wish you could see (virtually at least) the way I see you.

Roger said...

Good job Dianne! Hey to replie to your comment I hope you do join Creative Photography. :D

Dianne said...

diane - thank you! what a kind and lovely thing to say :)
like a virtual hug.

roger - I'm definitely going to join in! sounds like a fun idea.