Saturday, April 5, 2008

Saturday Wordzzle

Good Morning Boys and Girls!

Sometimes I get things wrong and they turn out so right. I love when that happens. I went to a party last night; drank a few Cosmos, danced a bit, talked a lot and laughed even more. I cringed at setting the alarm for 6 when I got home at 2! I’m too old for this. My mind, body and soul all nodded in agreement.

Alarm goes off at 6 this morning and mind, body and soul are really pissed. I check my giant-ass store schedule, knowing it will say I need to be there at 7:45 and … it says my shift starts at 11. 11 you exclaim! Yes! Yes! I respond – 11. Lovely, later 11.

Of course I don’t trust meself. I make the coffee, take the shower and try to soothe the alcohol ache – I don’t have a hangover really, I just ache. Aged Alcohol Ache. I check the schedule again – it still says 11 and the sun shines brightly and the angels sing.

Since going back to bed would seal my fate and render me fired I decide to savor my morning, drink my coffee, enjoy my Tylenols and give Wordzzle a Whirl!

Look out surly bargain shoppers. Beware incompetent, whiny co-workers. I’m on a roll.

Ten Word Challenge: fruitcake, necromancer, gibberish, marshland, Lone Ranger, hog-wild, effluvia, plaintiff, phonograph, fern

Fern was having trouble maneuvering the giant car through the tiny openings that passed for a road. She started to think she was crazy for taking the Lone Ranger out, it was her husband’s car and she had always had trouble handling it. “Lone Ranger” she laughed out loud, “what a fruitcake I am, it’s a Range Rover”. “No wonder I can’t navigate the marshlands, I don’t even know the name of the car!” She tried to calm herself by conjuring up her husband’s image, by putting him there in the seat next to her. She wondered if that was what a necromancer would do as she imagined Burt delivered to her side in an effluvia of bossy and bully. He’d go hog-wild to see her driving his precious Lone Ranger. “Good Lord!” she shouted, “now I’m talking gibberish, just as Burt always said I did”. She gripped the wheel tighter as Burt’s voice filled the car. “You sound like a broken phonograph” he barked at her and she giggled. How wonderful! – vaporous Burt confused words just as she did. “It’s broken record, not broken phonograph” she admonished. “So sue me!” he gasped as he began to dissipate. I would Fern thought triumphantly as she stepped on the gas in a burst of confidence. “And I would be the perfect plaintiff” she shouted out in glee.

And for the Mini Challenge: frozen, history, myrmidon, Shylock, incapacitated

Stan sat frozen at his desk. He had to be in court in less than an hour and he had a problem. He doubted his ability to defend his soul sucking clients, a large corporation that had stolen the pensions of hundreds of devoted workers. He could hear sweet gentle Sarah whispering to him, “walk away Stan, you’ll make history, you will be the one to cause the others to question”. Stan put his head in his hands and wondered how he could become incapacitated by a moral dilemma this late in his career. He shook himself free of his thoughts and pushed Sarah’s voice away. As he gathered up his papers and stuffed them into his satchel he knocked over a little plaque. It fell to the floor facing the sunlight from the open window. The glare from the sun on shiny metal blinded him but as a dark cloud passed he saw the etched words clearly. Shylock Stan – Most Valued Myrmidon. Stan blinked hard and sunlight once again filled his office. He picked up the tiny plaque and recognized it immediately. Happy 25th Anniversary – Most Treasured Husband – World’s Best Dad. Stan put the treasure in his pocket and headed down the hall, his posture straightening as his steps quickened. It was going to be an historic day.

Head on over to Raven’s place and give Mr. Linky a little love. Check out all the other stories and take a look at next weeks words. Consider playing along. If I can do it in Aged Alcohol Aching mode then so can you.


Raven said...

This was a three for one gift today. Your introduction was delightful and both of your paragraphs were brilliant. I just love Fern and the Lone Ranger and the dear departed Burt. The second one was a small masterpiece... a small moral tale. Love it.

Anonymous said...

Dianne, Beautifully written stories! All the words were in the right place ! Very creative! I'm new at this... Mine's up at Answers to the Questions :)

Akelamalu said...

Oh you're just sooooo good at this Dianne, I love them.

I know that 'Aged Alcohol Aching' so well, but I still keep doing it! My mind just won't accept that my body is old! :)

Linda Murphy said...

Hmmm, I like the continuing theme of naming cars...maybe an anthology of sorts? I'll have to send you a picture of my car for you to name. lol

I think you have a gift for the Wordzzle! I really enjoyed the second one.

Alcohol....hmm. Tonight we are having some friends for my son's 2nd birthday. My tradition is to make (or have someone) make sangria and I end up drinking most of it. It's my twice-a-year self soother as my boys get older. Anyway, I have to get started on the Wordzzle. I am actually not ahead this week. (slacker!)

Jay said...

Those were great! I love the naming of the car "The Lone Ranger" That was really clever.

You rock this game babe! ;-)

Richard said...

I liked the runup to the stories as much as the stories. I don't know whether to pity your customers today or you. Let me just say in my most Clintonian voice that "I feel your Pain". One of the great things about getting older is you understand the importance of living in the moment, one of the bad things is having to pay for it with aged bones and body the next morning!


Unknown said...

Dianne: You had Madonna's favorite drink! Woo Hoo! You Rock, Dianne!:)

Unknown said...

Awesome....truly awesome!

Betty said...

Great stories. I'm new to the Wordzzle, too. It's fun, isn't it?

Smalltown RN said...

Awesome stories Dianne...oh to be blessed with the talent of are very creative..and funny...thank you

Dianne said...

raven - thanks! I love Fern, I think Betty White should play her in the movie.

maryt - thanks so much. I'm making my way through all the stories, I'll be over to yours soon.

akelamalu - exactly! as today progressed my body and mind were really having an arguement.

snoopmurph - once the Sangria is made it can not go to waste so you're doing a good thing. Happy Birthday to Connor!!

jay - "You rock this game babe!"
Oh thanks so much Jay - my agededness needed to rock and be called babe today.

rich - remarkably I ended up being fine with the customers including screaming children who unplugged the cash register. you are so right about living in the moment, unfortunately every moment must be paid for with 2.

awwww - 2 good looking guys telling me I rock! thanks Michael. And isn't today your birthday!? Happy Birthday!

kim - thanks!

betty - so glad you joined in. I'll be over to read yours soon - it is fun.

smalltown rn - thank you, you always make me smile.

tt said...

I'm sooooo familiar with AAA! It just gets worse doesn' it?! :)
Bravo on the stories!!!!!!!! I loved the Lone Ranger/Range Rover...cute play on words there.
I'm thinking words are your game...yes? You're so good at it.
Cheers sister!

Dianne said...

tt - cheers to you too sister! The AAA is really getting to me now. I can't believe I'm still awake and (kind of) functioning. Remember when you could party two nights in a row!? Oy!

Anonymous said...

I'd never heard of this 'til reading your post.

You're good!

Debo Blue

R.E.H. said...

Great stories - very entertaining. The Lone Ranger name for a car was brilliant... If ever I buy a Range Rover that's what I'll name it!

Well played!

Dianne said...

debo blue - so nice to hear from you! thanks. check out the others at Raven's place. Every one of them is wonderful reading.

REH - you'd be so cool traveling the roads of (dare I say) California in your Lone Ranger.

Shelly said...

Once again...incredible stories!
Oh my gracious child, you were out 'til 2, go wild girl. I'm impressed, especially in light of the fact that you had to spend the whole next day at the retail jungle. Whoa.

Casdok said...

So clever! Great stories!

CG said...

Great stories again..! Glad you got a morning to yourself to recover from those cosmos!!

Dianne said...

shelly - the retail jungle was much tamer than I expected. I think people are over "clearance saled" and are now immune. I was grateful for that since my wild child is actually a bit older.

casdock - thanks!

cg - I was so thrilled when I saw 11 rather than 7:45. I was downright jubilant. glad you liked my stories.

Diane Mandy said...

Oh I enjoyed this post! I have been that woman at 6am after a night of too many cosmos, Every time it happens-- I wake up remembering this 40-year old body shouldn't be doing what it did at 20. But inevitably I do it again... and again.

bobbie said...

You are good! At first glance I thought this one had to be tough, but you handled it with ease.

I "borrowed" your Olympics handcuffs. Why did they decide to hold them there? Never mind - I know.

Dianne said...

diane mandy - and you're only 40! wait, wait LOL
I'm still feeling it and it's been 3 days. So glad you enjoyed my stories.

bobbie - whatever is mine is yours. I just saw footage of the protests following the torch and then a sickening statment by a Chinese official. And Bushie wants to go to the opening ceremony! It never ends does it!? Never mind - I know too.